Day Four: No Thoughts

The moment the man finished speaking, it felt as if the entire world came to a sudden halt.

Lu Shuyan stared intently at the reaction of the person across from him after uttering those words.

He saw her lips, which had been curved upward in delight, drop ever so slightly—so subtly that if he hadn’t been watching so closely, it would have gone unnoticed. Then, just as quickly, those corners lifted again, returning to their previous angle.

It was a stiffness born from intense control over facial muscles, an emotion bypassing the mind’s regulation.

Si Nian thought she must have misheard.

But the man’s reaction told her otherwise; he was replaying the words he had just spoken with his eyes, the reason he had called her out tonight to have a serious talk—something that had nearly made her deliriously happy since the afternoon—those four words:

We’re getting married.

“……”

Si Nian’s mind lost all sense of direction in that instant.

“I, I…”

She couldn’t even form the words. Tonight was supposed to be about breaking up, so why was Lu Shuyan suddenly proposing? And if this could be called a proposal, shouldn’t there at least be a ring, even if not a single-knee kneel? No, no, how did things get to this point? She didn’t want to marry Lu Shuyan. After enduring so much hardship, her ultimate goal was to get the money and leave. But marriage meant she could never clock out—that this fight would last a lifetime.

Lu Shuyan calmly watched Si Nian’s face flush red. Though she was smiling, her eyes betrayed an increasing panic.

“Day 1,713,” the man’s face bore no warmth typical of a proposal; his voice was laced with biting sarcasm. “Si Nian, we should get married.”

Si Nian looked up sharply.

…

Outside the private dining room, a waiter stood by the door.

This was one of the highest-rated Michelin-starred restaurants in City B, frequented daily by the rich and powerful. But when the waiter saw the apparent couple—or perhaps young newlyweds—arrive at the VIP room tonight, despite his worldly experience, he couldn’t help but sigh at how pleasing to the eye they were.

He began quietly speculating in his mind whether the two were married yet, thinking that if they weren’t, it would be a shame not to get engaged given the atmosphere tonight.

Until muffled arguing suddenly drifted out from inside.

The waiter frowned and instinctively pressed closer to the entrance.

Inside the room.

The candles on the table still flickered gently, but all the lights had been switched on.

Si Nian parted her lips slightly, facing the man who had just said “Day 1,713,” feeling a bone-chilling coldness crawl from her heels all the way to her head.

There was no sentimental meaning to such a precise number; only a phone diary would record such a thing.

She never imagined that while she had just gone to the bathroom, Lu Shuyan had looked at her phone.

Lu Shuyan never looked at her phone. A man like him held disdain for such behavior.

So at the start of their relationship, to show thoughtfulness, she had boldly registered his face for the phone’s facial recognition.

Time passed so long that sometimes she forgot he could unlock her phone, and she felt safe leaving it in rooms where he was.

Until one day, Pandora’s box was opened.

Realizing what had happened, Si Nian felt dizzy and weak.

“No, it’s not what you think,” she stood up abruptly, trying to explain.

“Not what I think?” Lu Shuyan remained unmoved, his face revealing only the absurdity and anger he felt.

Si Nian: “I…”

Lu Shuyan recited, “Day 1: So happy we officially became boyfriend and girlfriend.”

“Day 180: Half a year, didn’t expect him to still be so devoted.”

“Day 365: One year, can’t stand it anymore, persistence is victory.”

“Day 713: Two years of struggle, enduring hardship, can earn eight figures.”

“Day 1,674: Nearly five years, Lu Shuyan, you bastard, I want to tear you apart.”

His eyes were sharp enough to dissect her as he repeated, word by word, the entries he’d read from her online diary—texts casually recorded at milestones by the phone’s owner.

He asked her, “Wasn’t it like that at all?”

Si Nian suddenly felt doomed.

The very words she had written, spoken calmly by him, made her feel utterly exposed, as if stripped bare and scrutinized. She staggered weakly.

Lu Shuyan looked at her, “Si Nian, have you got the eight-figure sum yet?”

She followed his gaze.

Suddenly her vision blurred, a cold sweat broke out on her face, and before she knew it, tears streamed uncontrollably.

Lu Shuyan, unusually feeling absurd, watched her cry and asked, “You deliberately wanted to meet me, didn’t you?”

“From the very first time.”

“I didn’t want to meet you on purpose!” Si Nian immediately raised her voice to deny. She had no intention of meeting Lu Shuyan; back then, she didn’t even know who he was—just a handsome but arrogant exchange student who seemed to regard her as a contagion when she accidentally sat on him after entering the wrong classroom. She was busy working multiple part-time jobs, with no interest in a man who didn’t appeal to her in any way.

Lu Shuyan didn’t believe her.

He recalled the diary—a record that was the ultimate humiliation to him—from the day he officially proposed being in a relationship, marking every day up to the present.

“Thank you for these 1,713 days.”

Si Nian was speechless.

Then suddenly, she stood up.

Panicked, she ran to Lu Shuyan, grabbing his sleeve and repeatedly apologizing: “I’m sorry, Lu Shuyan, I’m sorry.”

Tears fell like broken pearls from her face. “Those things I wrote were nonsense; I never meant them.”

“I’ve always been serious, truly serious about being with you. We’ve been together so long; don’t you know what kind of person I am? I never thought that way, and I don’t know how those words appeared. Please believe me.”

Lu Shuyan looked into her face.

A beautiful face, eyes red and tearful, pitiful enough to soften any man’s heart. But to Lu Shuyan, at that moment, it felt only ironic.

Some things are like that—when you’re immersed in them, you fail to see the glaring flaws; but once you break free and awaken, even the most exquisite disguise is utterly exposed.

He gently brushed away her hand still clutching his sleeve.

“Are you apologizing because you truly feel sorry, or because…”

He paused, looking into her eyes, asking, “The money still hasn’t arrived?”

Si Nian’s tears froze instantly.

She stepped back incredulously, shaking her head slightly, then watched Lu Shuyan stand up. There was nearly a twenty-centimeter height difference between them.

“Si Nian,” after tearing apart all those unbearable things, Lu Shuyan’s brow finally showed a trace of weary emotion, “I also thought we’d part amicably.”

But in the end, that wasn’t the case.

Si Nian watched as the man turned away from her.

Just as his fingers nearly grasped the door handle, she suddenly sobered, rushed forward, and tightly embraced his slender waist from behind, saying, “I didn’t mean that.”

“Don’t think of me that way.”

Si Nian: “I’m sorry, Shuyan. I was wrong, I was wrong. Can we start over?”

“I admit it was my fault at the beginning, I was a bit selfish, but you know my financial situation—I’ve been working hard. I had no choice. I promise you, since I’ve been with you, I never thought that way. I truly want to be with you. After all these years, I only want to stay by your side. You mean everything to me.”

Lu Shuyan reluctantly turned back.

He faced the woman who was pleading with tears and grandiose lies, who seemed on the verge of swearing an oath.

If a person was soft-hearted enough, no matter how much humiliation or anger they bore, hearing such confessions and seeing such a scene might cause cracks.

Unfortunately, he was not that person.

Lu Shuyan pried apart the arms wrapped around his waist.

“Si Nian,” he said with a tone half mocking, half self-deprecating, word by word:

“You still think I’m a fool.”

Si Nian’s arms were roughly removed.

She looked up into his eyes—cold as frost, devoid of any warmth.

Only then did she realize that no matter what she said or how she tried to mend things, it was useless.

Lu Shuyan continued walking toward the door.

But in the next second, someone grabbed his clothes from behind.

This time, Si Nian clearly knew she couldn’t keep pretending. No matter how much she apologized or begged, it was futile. She took off the pitiful mask and cried out, “You’re not allowed to leave!”

Grasping his coat tightly with one hand, wiping tears with the other, she stammered in panic: “No matter what, I’ve truly been with you for almost five years. Everyone knows about us—that’s real.”

“You snooped through my phone while I wasn’t around—don’t you think you were wrong too?”

“You say you want to end it now—is that just to say a few words and get rid of me?”

“You can’t do this. I was wrong, but…”

Her chest tightened, and she couldn’t continue.

They had even been intimate just last night.

Lu Shuyan turned back once more.

Then he looked into those red, unmasked eyes pleading with him and asked, “Then what do you want?”

Si Nian struggled to calm herself, wiped her tears, and stretched out a hand.

She had originally wanted to say fifty million, but facing his chilling gaze, she changed it to “five million.”

One million per year—no cheaper offer possible.

For Lu Shuyan, he could earn that in less than a second just standing there.

For her, it was her last plea and compromise.

Lu Shuyan’s gaze fell on the hand she extended.

Then he slowly looked at her face—the look of someone determined not to give up until she got what she wanted.

Finally, from above, he spoke quietly and clearly, uttering two words to her:

“Keep dreaming.”

Without another glance, Lu Shuyan left.

Si Nian’s whole world crumbled.