Chapter Five: Reeducation (Middle)

ICP Filing No.: Xiang B2-20100081-3. Internet Publishing Qualification: New Internet Publication Permit (Xiang) No. 11. Internet Culture Business License: Wenwen [2010] No. 128.

Thus began the strenuous period of study.
From that day on, Xiu Yi formally started teaching the thieves how to learn and understand the habits of high society.

Each dawn the brigands were required to wear neat noble garments, tie a cravat, don a black top hat, fasten a pocket watch to their chests, and carry a gentleman’s cane.
They had to learn to take off their hats and bow when meeting others, instead of charging at each other and clashing with fists. As their master liked to say, “Only country bumpkins and ignorant yokels make such displays.”
When facing a lady, they had to know how to pull a chair for her instead of plopping down first, and to remember that ladies come first.

Baring the chest, picking one’s nose, putting feet on chairs, squatting while eating, and swearing obscenely were absolutely forbidden.
Likewise, they were not allowed to urinate outdoors, to binge drink, to drink hard liquor, or to go hunting girls in low dives.

“In face-to-face conversation, your speech must be slow, firm, and rhythmic. Do not rant and rave in long speeches, leaving no room for the other person. Do not interrupt. Pronounce each word clearly, and use proper courtly diction—never let rustic slang escape.”
“When the other speaks, stay calm, bend your back slightly, and appear to be listening. Even if they are speaking nonsense, you must still look as if you are listening with full attention. If you disagree, do not say directly that they are wrong; use a gentler tone: ‘Your point is very reasonable, but I have some different thoughts…’ You may think them a heap of filth in your heart, but your face should look as if you see a fresh flower.”

“So hypocritical.”
“Correct. A gentleman’s trait—really a nobleman’s trait—is hypocrisy, and that is what you are learning now.”

Xiu Yi did not punish the one who interrupted. “Also, when two people converse face to face, never place one leg over the other. This habit of crossing your legs is a major breach of etiquette and makes you look completely without breeding.”

The thieves grumbled aloud: “Good heavens, there are so many rules. It’s unbearable. We even have to follow rules for how to stand and sit!”
One brigand shouted louder: “No feet on chairs, no picking your beloved toe… now I can’t even rest one leg on the other. Then where am I supposed to put it? I’ve sat like this since I was born. My legs stay right here.” He banged his own thigh.
For the moment, to defend his “right,” he even forgot the danger of the so-called “devil” before him.

“Are you sure that is how you want it?” Xiu Yi asked mildly.
“Yes. Even if you kill me,” the brigand answered with pride.
“Good,” Xiu Yi nodded.
The next moment his body flashed like lightning. A red streak of steel cut through the air.
In the brigand’s horrified scream, a long sword passed through both his thighs and fixed them together.
“If you enjoy keeping your legs folded like that,” Xiu Yi said, “I can help you secure them until you finally decide that pose is not so comfortable.”

The boy’s methods were bloody, ruthless, and direct.
The brigands finally woke up to one fact: this was never a compassionate master.
Their nasty habits were too many to list, and to erase them in such a short time required harsh means.
A cruel man has no patience for waiting. Those who refuse to change must pay heavily.
Before the lash, everyone learns quickly.
Brutality is often more efficient than kindness. A tyrant may be hated by all, but until he is overthrown, his orders are carried out first and without delay.

As for what came after… Xiu Yi was certain this crowd of unschooled country yokels would eventually come to love this life.
With forceful discipline, followed later by a life of comfort, any hardship could be compensated.
Of course, before that, the brigands would have to endure a very special ordeal.

In the valley, scenes like grotesque comic acts began to unfold.

“To become a gentleman you must possess a gentleman’s aura. What people call aura is not some intangible vapor; it is a combination of glance, movement, conduct, and bearing—a manifestation of cultivated character. I must say your aura means that even in tuxedos you remain a lot of rough men.”
“Look at your eyes. You all look at others like wolves eyeing lambs. No—learn to look at others with calm eyes, not with the expression meant to cow them. Remember, you are no longer robbing; you no longer need the look of murder in your eyes to force someone to hand over a purse. Don’t stare at people like they were fat sheep grazing in your sightline. Your gaze is full of cruelty and greed.”
“Look at me. Let there be a smile. Let love fill your eyes, let there be a spark of wisdom in them, even if you have no wisdom at all.”

“By the gods, this is too hard,” the thieves complained loudly.
“Rellesh, come up and demonstrate. Stand by me and look at me.”
Rellesh came with heavy steps and stared at Xiu Yi with predatory eyes.
“The eyes are the best window to a person’s emotions,” Xiu Yi said, gesturing toward the big brute for the others to see. “Joy, laughter, grief, anger—they all appear there. Rellesh, in your eyes I see deep hatred.”
“Yes, my powerful and generous master. I have never hated a bastard as fiercely as I do now. If my eyes could become blades, I would cut him into shreds. If they could become fire, I would burn him to cinders. If they could become an endless sea, that sea could drown the devil I hate!”
Xiu Yi was almost… moved.
“Well spoken. As a former leader, you have always been braver than the rest. I never thought hatred could make you a poet. Since I first met you, this is the most beautiful language I have heard.”
Xiu Yi leaned close to Rellesh’s ear. “If such hatred can keep you in this state constantly, then I allow you to put the name Xiu Grayle in your mouth and curse that bastard in the way I taught you. But remember: it must be done the right way.”
Rellesh licked his lips and said, “Master Xiu Grayle, you are the most gallant rogue I have ever seen. I pray to heaven you are always so.”
His tone was extraordinarily gentle.
“Excellent,” Xiu Yi laughed. “Look everyone. Rellesh has done it. His gaze is now tender. Remember, the eyes are the window of the heart, and what you must learn now is to learn how to close that window. Practice whenever you can. Next, we begin another lesson.”

With the course in full swing, their misery only began.
“Walking is another basic expression of noble deportment. Your footsteps should be as light as possible, and your manner should remain leisurely and at ease. Nobles do not toil in labor, so there is no reason to appear frantic. Even in an emergency, you only quicken your pace. Above all, do not run. When have you ever seen a gentleman running in the street?”
“You walk like a duck, swinging your arms too wide. Cut it down—are you looking for a fight? You are not here to collect a debt. Drop that toad-like swagger, you lout.” Xiu Yi kicked the offender clean across the yard.
“Speak with a sincere and forceful tone, and pronounce clearly. Sera, your tongue is wide enough to cook an entire dish.”
“Master, my mouth...” Sera mumbled.
“Fix it, or I’ll make you swallow weight-loss draughts every day.”

“When drinking, there are proper ways for each kind of alcohol, and none of them is your current method—that is called gulps fit for a brute. Even the roughest servant would not drink like that. If you cannot break this habit, I won’t mind pouring a liter of horse urine down your throats every day. Then perhaps you will learn what it means to savor slowly.”
“Dancing is one of the most common and practical ways nobles socialize. When you invite a lady, learn the basic polite gestures. First approach her, but do not stand too close. Extend your right hand and trace a graceful arc through the air as I do, then place it over your heart. Put your left hand behind your back and bow at about forty-five degrees. At the same moment, your left foot should tap backward slightly and your knee bend a little. While sweeping your right hand, do not touch the woman you are inviting, and don’t perform the gesture from too far away or people won’t know whom you mean. Rellesh, do it.”

Rellesh, clearly unwilling, demonstrated for everyone.
“Your rear is stuck up too high,” Xiu Yi snapped, his whip striking hard. “Lift your face slightly and look at that ‘lady’ with a lover’s eyes. Hold a soft, affectionate expression—yes, yes, do not move, let everyone see your posture.”
Rellesh stood there like a marble statue, held in place for nearly half an hour for them to study.

“At dinner, hold the fork in your left hand and the knife in your right. Cutting food is an art. With a toothed blade, cut with angle and finesse; no need for such force. Do you have a grudge against the food?”
“If you dare cut a plate in half, I’ll cram this junk into your mouth.”
“Making noise while eating is impolite.”
“Whoever lifts a bowl of soup to gulp it in will become soup himself.”
“Wash your hands before meals and do not splash food onto the table.”
“Do not drink your rinse water.”
“After eating, remember to wipe your stinking mouths.”

“When pouring coffee,” he said, “be slow. Keep your back straight; do you want to pour boiling water over me?”
“Yes… I do want to do that, my powerful and generous master.”
“...Very well. In any case, you’ve improved. You can now curse without using filth, and that is heartening.”

“What are you doing?”
“I’m urinating, Master.”
“Then why are you still shaking?”
“It’s a habit. After I’m done, I always have to shake a little to dry it.”
Xiu Yi’s cane tapped the brigand’s groin. “Shake there. No need to shake your whole body.”
The brigand stared blankly as he walked away. “This devil even tells others how to pee?”
“Don’t mind it, friend. He doesn’t even allow… indecency,” another muttered.

“Poetry refines the spirit, expresses feeling, and teaches us to appreciate a beautiful life. It helps you feel beauty. We should learn to understand poetry, and at least learn to recite it aloud.”
“My great master, I made a poem praising you.”
“Is that so, Rellesh? Recite it.”
“Oh, Master! You are so great you are as pure as a firefly’s glow, bringing light to all! You are a burning mass of foulness, and we are the flies that never stop circling you!”
“Excellent. Very good indeed. Who else has written verse? I hope not all of it has you as the subject.”
“I wrote one praising the weather and sunshine and rain.”
“Oh, yes, Rellon, come read it.”
“It is a bright rainy day, and the great master walks the fields of the city with your graceful stride…”
“Enough. Very good. I think you should first learn to memorize poems before attempting your own.”

Looking back, Xiu Yi saw young Xu doubled over, laughing so hard he nearly collapsed. As for the blazing birds, they dropped from the sky straight to the ground, landing upright like saplings driven into the earth.
Under Xiu Yi’s pressure, the brigands began to transform from mountain bandits into people fit for higher circles.
They studied all manner of knowledge, etiquette, and the traditional culture of the Lanse Empire, learning to be true refined gentlemen.

At dawn, Rellesh—former brigand leader—walked through muddy fields in proper ceremonial dress, hat, and cane. When he saw a brigand carefully spread stiff fingers apart and lift the cup from below to taste sweet white wine, he laughed. “Ah, Lio Condi. Good to see you again. In such a fine morning, one glass of wine truly gives strength.”
Lio Condi’s face brightened with warm smiles. “Ah, so it is merciful Lord Rellesh. I rarely see you pass my door. Will you stay for a drink?”
“Not today,” Rellesh said, waving his cane. “Baron Alexis Jains is waiting for me. The weather is good; we agreed to ride out together.”
“The weather is excellent, yes,” Lio said. “The fog is thick; you cannot see the road, yet it gives a mysterious feeling. When you ride, be careful not to run into the thickets. Some troublemakers dug pits there, hoping a bastard named Xiu Grayle would ride into one. How cursed that they never got their wish.”
“I will be careful. Let us bless this fine weather,” Rellesh said and strode past.

Right away he moved to another brigand and, with a look of theatrical surprise, said, “My heavens—look who this is! Lady Ed Bellom! You look beautiful today.”
The brigand in women’s clothing, pretending to read, glared at Rellesh and answered in a soft, feminine tone, “So it is Lord Rellesh. How glad I am to see you. I am not well today.”
“What is wrong with you?”
“I’m withering from today’s hardships. I no longer look as beautiful. I fear my husband no longer loves me,” she said, placing a hand on her cheek and feigning woe.

Rellesh patted her shoulder sympathetically. “And why have you taken this woman’s form today?”
“That cursed Xiu Grayle—yesterday I memorized only twelve words,” the “lady” replied with a sobbing voice.
“Pitiable indeed. Still, thank you for your effort. Yesterday I memorized fifteen, five short of the twenty-word standard. The old sages were right: when a beast is after you, running faster than the slowest one is enough.”
“Please, stop taunting me.”
“Call me Lord Rellesh. The title sounds pleasant enough at times.”
Rellesh stepped back, raised his large hand toward Ed Bellom, and said, “Madam, in my eyes your beauty is still beyond reproach. I believe your husband still loves you as ever.”
“Are you certain?” Ed Bellom’s eyes flashed with something one could call excitement.
“Yes.” Rellesh answered earnestly, then moved closer to her ear. “A face like one kicked by a donkey will make every man want to hold tight to his purse.”
“Oh! Such gracious words,” she replied with both hands over her chest and a wry expression.
Rellesh turned away in annoyance. “That miserable line makes me sick to my stomach.”

Shuyi, after shooing away the warbler-like birds nearby, bent down and looked at the little dragon at his side.
“They are doing well, aren’t they?”
Xu merely huffed and ignored him.
Even a beast could see there was still a great distance between these bandits and true high-born men.
If one had to measure that distance, one might as well use light-years.

“I know you look down on them,” Shuyi said. “Still, Xu, you must believe people have potential. Deep inside, everyone has motivation to rise. Before, they had no opportunities and lacked good education. They are not this way because they truly loved their old lives, but because they adapted to those lives. In society there are many environments, and those who adapt fastest can live more comfortably. For good habits and good life, they will adapt even faster. For now, they only lack a few necessary external conditions.”
He looked at the young one. “Time is precious. The thieves have already begun learning. Shouldn’t you begin too? You cannot be lazy simply because Father dotes on you.”

“Wrr!”
Learning made the little creature tingle; the word “father” made it tremble.
“Fine then. You can’t have me whipping you into learning spells, can you?”
The little one responded with a resentful growl, as if daring him.
“But if you do not learn, you cannot stay forever as my backup mana reservoir. Do you think it suitable for a great dragon to remain merely the power source for a human? Don’t you think that sounds debased?”
“Wrrr…”
“Believe me, Xu, learning magic is not so difficult. Before your gift fully reveals itself, we can begin with human spells. You are a genius; you should not live up to the title of prodigy. Many human children can recite poetry by the time they are four or five. You are the little prodigy among dragons, the darling of heaven, the wisest of magical beasts—you can become a master of human magic even while still juvenile. Imagine it: standing at the summit before maturity, receiving the world’s reverence. What joy that would be.”
The little one gazed at him with helpless eyes. Without words, his thought was clear: you only want me to be your free bodyguard, don’t you?

Xiu Yi sensed it too. Color rose to his face as he nodded. “Yes. Red and Green have already been exposed, but you have not. I was able to let them appear because your presence is actually stronger than theirs. You are my most important card. But that card has not yet become an ace… I need you, Xu.
In the days ahead I may face many hard battles. Some battles cannot be decided by me alone. In many cases the mind is not enough; formidable strength is still a necessary backup. So I need you.”
The little one exhaled, then barked a few times.
“If you agree to study properly, I’ll promise you hearty meals every day. We have more than forty men now; I’ll have them bring you lots of good food. What do you think? Don’t you like beast-meat? I’ll have them fetch only the wildest, fattest ones.”
The wind carried this to Rellesh and the others; a shiver ran through the bandits together.
Xu fixed him with his gaze and raised one forepaw, showing all five claws.
“Five a day?”
Xu nodded.
“You can’t eat that much. You’d get fat.”
He stamped his foot and looked as if he wanted that much.
“Then, one beast per spell. Learn one spell, get one crystal.”
Xu bristled in anger.
Xiu Yi did not budge.
After a moment, the little one finally withdrew two claws with visible effort.
Xiu Yi grinned. “Good. Then three spells.”
Xu sadly realized that the free feast had vanished.
Seeing that, Xiu Yi laughed in relief; after his relentless verbal drilling day after day, the little thing had finally lowered its head in reluctant assent.
“Thank you, Xu. If you wish, we can also practice close combat and team tactics. Will you do that?”
“Wurf… Wurf! Wurf!”
“You mean yes by silence?”
“Wurf! Wurf! Wurf!”
Xu bared his teeth and barked in fury—clearly, he meant no.”